Goodnight Sweet Girl. A Poem

Rocking softly in this chair,

I run my fingers through your hair.

Nursing milk from my breast,

You drift gently down to rest.

My 4 Year Old is a Shitty Sleeper.

Why is it that eyes roll when a parent dares to vent to another that their child doesn’t sleep well? If little Jonny doesn’t fall asleep on his own in his own room at 6:30pm with a kiss and a farewell, and sleeps through the night for 14 hours without a bathroom break, he never wakes from a bad dream or for water. He doesn’t ever need reassurance from mom, the dark doesn’t bother him, I mean he’s 6 months old after all WHY WOULDN’T HE BE A PERFECT SLEEPER?! Why are the expectations so ridiculous? Other parents, if you have a perfect sleeper, good for you, I have 1 and do you know what I don’t do? Rub it in a new parents face, or a veteran parents face. If you have 6 children and none of them have slept through the night, do you know what that means? You have normal children!

We so often forget our own struggles when someone mentions their own, or we jump to the ever so helpful “advice” mode of sleep curealls that you’ve tried or your cousins sisters neice tried and it worked that one time.

Children are people. Read that slower. Children are people. Meaning just like you, your child might experience the occasional nightmare, they might have to pee at 3am, it might take them an hour of laying in bed, staring at the ceiling thinking about all of their faults and mistakes of the day before they can make their little brains shut off and sleep like you’ve been screaming at them to do since basically birth.

“Aw beautiful baby. Is she sleeping through the night?’

I don’t know Susan, are you? Do you consistently fall asleep immediately with minimal effort and not wake for anything ever? No? Oh, what a shame.

Others sometimes form the opinion that the parent of the sleepless child (I have one of those too) must be doing something wrong. I have to tell you, it isn’t something that is being done incorrectly. Big boy beds, cool new blankets, dream catchers, night lights, teddy bear shrines. You could do them all simultaneously and a shitty sleeper would (surprise!) Still have a hard time sleeping!

If a fellow parent confides in you that their child isn’t sleeping or has trouble falling asleep, pour them some fresh coffee and tell that sucks but it will get better. Because eventually the shitty sleeper will find their groove, or move out, whichever comes first.